The military and sexism

I've always known how sexist the military can be -- I am a part of it, but always assumed such rampant sexism was left to your younger, uneducated servicemembers. But earlier this morning, I had a conversation that made me realize that even the "old timers" can be extremely exist. Standing outside at the smoke deck (I don't smoke, but like to get fresh air while I drink my Red Bulls), I had a conversation with a man who's been in the military for about 20 years. We were talking about summer, and drinking and relaxing.

He'd mentioned that once, when he was 19, he was put in jail for hitting a high ranking officer in the face. It turns out he did so because he'd received a "dear John" phone call and was upset.Looking at this guy, I said, "Isn't it amazing the stupid shit we do for love when we're young?" To which, of course, he responded."They say money is the root of all evil. It's really not. It's women. Them bitches can ruin your life."I really didn't know what to say to that. I am a feminist, I love women in both romantic and platonic sense. Yet, my life has never, ever be ruined. No one has ever "done me wrong."

I realized that these men who blame their downfalls on women are the same ones who just couldn't quite make it in life. Perhaps he was dumped because he was a loser, and not because she was evil.

At times like those, I wonder what my role is as a feminist. At school, I am outspoken. At meetings, even more so. I am known as the "feminist guy" on campus. But what of my role in the military? Do I stand up and speak out against such silly sexism, or is it really a moot point? Do I have an obligation to speak up? How much, really, is too much to do as a feminist? Even if this guy is sexist, and I believe he is, what can one guy really affect the plight of women negatively or positively? Sometimes, I just don't have all the answers as a feminist.